I'm in a weird transition stage of my life at the moment: just finished my degree, looking for jobs, a Masters degree due to start in September and my 22nd birthday around the corner. I used to hate when things changed and it would always take me a long time to adapt and get used to a new way of living. But this time is a little different, I've got a whole bag of emotions going through my head. Partly excited, partly anxious but also in a reflective kind of mood which has prompted this post. Thinking back to my first ever post in which I had a yearning to discover myself and to understand what makes me tick I feel like I've learnt so much about myself since then. I think it's essential in life to always keep learning, growing and discovering, you can never know too much!
This year I've learnt so much about myself and the way I interact in the world and it's been interesting to reconnect with myself and mature as a person. The past 9 months or so has been particularly intense, trying to do well in my final year and also generally live my life. I think my outlook on life has changed greatly since I first started Uni. I'm much more driven and self assured now than I was before and sometimes I even scare myself with how driven I can be when I'm passionate about something. Aside from my ambitious nature I've discovered that I'm the sort of person that 'feels' a lot. By that I mean that I'm very emotive and whilst some people might not understand why I sometimes cry when I'm happy that's just me and I'm cool with it. I also learnt a lot about how other people perceive me which is always interesting. I think on occasions, particularly by males, I'm underestimated. I remember a few weeks ago a male friend of mine warned me off another guy because he didn't have particularly honourable intentions. I remember thinking to myself, doesn't he know that I already sussed this guy out time ago? Although I may come across as shy or timid I'm not afraid to stand my ground and after all the blows life has dealt me I'm not going to let anyone take me for a ride.
One of the biggest markers of the year has been about spreading positivity. I have been blessed beyond measure in many aspects of my life: family, friends, opportunities etc. and for me it's important to share some of the gifts I have received. There have been so many times, where just an encouraging word or bit of support has made a significant difference in my life and so I have endeavoured to spread positivity in the lives of people around me.
All in all I can say that life is pretty good for me at the moment. I have grown in many ways and I'm looking forward to more growth and more reflection!
Monday, June 18, 2012
The Death of Chivalry
This post is in reference to an event that happened over a month or so ago, just been to busy to blog/vent my anger about it.
It would appear that the age of the gentleman is well and truly over (although some will argue the age of the lady is also over too) but this particular event really made me think about the concept of chivalry and just common decency. Basically, an acquaintance of mine came to me for advice regarding a certain lady he was interested in. He had taken her out for a meal and had stated that the evening had gone well and they had a good connection. His dilemma was that since their meal there had been no further contact from her. I suggested that maybe she was waiting for him to make the first move and that he should take the plunge and contact her regarding a 2nd date. The next day he informed me that she had still not responded to his text. I proceeded with the whole 'you win some, you lose some' talk but received a very different response to what I had expected. The boy proceeded to tell me that he was going to contact the girl again, but to request his money back for the meal he had bought her. SORRY WHAT?? Words cannot describe my confusion/anger/concern after hearing this statement. So in this boy's head it's reasonable to request a refund for an endeavour that didn't turn out as expected. Simply because the girl wasn't into him, she now owes him for the meal he offered to pay for? Is this what the world is coming to? Now a girl can't be taken to dinner without the expectation that it's going to lead to something more? The joke is that this particular guy isn't even looking to settle or commit to someone and as far as I'm concerned the girl had a lucky escape. I did not even hesitate to tell this guy about himself and in all fairness I was a bit ashamed to be affiliated with him after that occasion. It would appear that in this day and age people aren't willing to invest unless there is a certain benefit for them too. I honestly hope that this guy is an exception to the rule because the world would be a pretty sad place to live in if everyone lived by that same code. My conclusion is that chivalry is definitely on it's deathbed but who knows, maybe someone will prove me wrong.
It would appear that the age of the gentleman is well and truly over (although some will argue the age of the lady is also over too) but this particular event really made me think about the concept of chivalry and just common decency. Basically, an acquaintance of mine came to me for advice regarding a certain lady he was interested in. He had taken her out for a meal and had stated that the evening had gone well and they had a good connection. His dilemma was that since their meal there had been no further contact from her. I suggested that maybe she was waiting for him to make the first move and that he should take the plunge and contact her regarding a 2nd date. The next day he informed me that she had still not responded to his text. I proceeded with the whole 'you win some, you lose some' talk but received a very different response to what I had expected. The boy proceeded to tell me that he was going to contact the girl again, but to request his money back for the meal he had bought her. SORRY WHAT?? Words cannot describe my confusion/anger/concern after hearing this statement. So in this boy's head it's reasonable to request a refund for an endeavour that didn't turn out as expected. Simply because the girl wasn't into him, she now owes him for the meal he offered to pay for? Is this what the world is coming to? Now a girl can't be taken to dinner without the expectation that it's going to lead to something more? The joke is that this particular guy isn't even looking to settle or commit to someone and as far as I'm concerned the girl had a lucky escape. I did not even hesitate to tell this guy about himself and in all fairness I was a bit ashamed to be affiliated with him after that occasion. It would appear that in this day and age people aren't willing to invest unless there is a certain benefit for them too. I honestly hope that this guy is an exception to the rule because the world would be a pretty sad place to live in if everyone lived by that same code. My conclusion is that chivalry is definitely on it's deathbed but who knows, maybe someone will prove me wrong.
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